Insecure Writers Support Group is a great bunch of people. You should join!
Now on to my insecurity. My fear currently is that I have lost my "spark." I've had a rough couple of months in my personal life, and as result that burning need to write has receded to the background. That is new for me. Usually if I'm upset, I want to write more than ever! So now I'm scare the spark won't come back. With work, and hour commute, kiddo and family, I don't have time for the thing that I want to do. And then when I do get time, I'm so flat out exhausted that I fall asleep staring at the computer screen. Have I completely lost my creativity? That part of me that makes me ME? It has been trying to ignite this last week or so, but still I worry. I suppose the fact that I worry about losing my will to write is a pretty good indication that this won't happen, but I'm a worrier by nature so of course I can't stop worrying. Anyway, I've devised a plan to help me get some actual writing done.
Step 1: Quit job
Step 2: Sell all worldly belongings
Step 3: Find a sheltered spot under a bridge
Step 4: Stop bathing
Step 5: Grow a hobo beard
Step 6: Take my small dog and hobo beard to the park
Step 7: Scribble random insane ramblings onto newspaper I found in the trash
Step 8: Wait for one of the following to happen- A) Someone takes pity on me and realizes that my insane ramblings are actually some sort of brilliant satire aimed at the materialistic world that I've given up (along with heat and health insurance) or B) Supernatural creatures arrive and tell me that they DO exist and invite me to live with them.
Fail proof.
I think that is a fantastic plan. It may sound crazy to others but I do see how it would solve most problems. Mostly, I hope that supernatural creatures do pop in to save the day, see? You are keeping it sane in my eyes. Mind you, I might not be the right person to listen to. (obviously) lol
ReplyDeleteThis was too funny. Loved it. Sorry you are having a tough time, though. Hugs!
It sounds like you're kinda busy. I can see how that would make living under a bridge seem pretty attractive (believe me, I have kids. I know...) I found this book, "Steal Like An Artist" (http://austinkleon.com/steal/) incredibly helpful. Reminded me to play more and worry less. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteHang in there! Maybe if you give yourself permission to step back and re-charge, the spark will return?
ReplyDelete'Don't give up Kaye, I'm sure you will rekindle the spark of creativity soon. Life has a habit of knocking us sideways sometimes. I've felt like this myself the last few months. Take care.
ReplyDeleteCan I come with you? (Except for the growing hobo beard part) ... I get this. I sooooo get this. And you know, I do think the answer is stepping back for a bit. I know I'm just starting to reemerge and I do feel better about the whole writing thing. It's hard. Really, really hard. <3
ReplyDeleteHobos FTW!
ReplyDeleteSounds like a... plan? :) The spark will come back once things settle down. I have been in the situation before where, the more stress in my life, the less I want to write. It should be the opposite, writing is an escape. But with everything else going on inside my brain, how can my characters push to the forefront? It'll come back. The fact that you're worried is proof positive that you still have the will to write!
ReplyDeleteI like your plan! Life will throw all kinds of sh*t at you and dodging them is not always easy, but you will never stop being who you are. You may need a bit of space to replenish the well. Live, breath, and relax. When the time is right, your soul and body will be ready to go on. You'll see.
ReplyDeleteBest of luck!
I don't really think it's a permanent thing. You're tired, and you need rest. At some stage, your creativity will come back. If you're too tired to write, read instead. Or paint, or do whatever you think you need to do to refill your creative well.
ReplyDeleteGood luck!